Where do we go from here....

I am writing this now with such a heavy heart. When will I feel normal again???? We have been feeling like maybe we need to explore our adoption options. I have spent COUNTLESS hours pouring over research and information from different agencies. I found out today that because of the anxiety meds that my hubby takes - we are ineligible for most international adoption. Seriously. So frustrating--- Then I think, well maybe this is God's way of telling us, we need to plan for IVF...So I do research on IVF with ICSI (which is what we would have to do because of our infertility issues) - The percentages are just not good. So what do we do? I try really hard not to be sad about what we are going through- but it is SO hard. Anytime I see a baby- talk about baby things- hang with my friends and their children- It is a constant reminder. I wish my yearn for a baby would just go away.