Post Surgery

So the deed is done. We were at the surgery center for most of Friday. When I went back to see him in post op, I (of course) almost passed out and the nurse had to bring ME orange juice. AWESOME...I am the best wife ever... After that, I pretty much got it together and got Chad ready to go home. With the help of his wonderful nurse, we got him in the car and started our journey home. Poor Chad didn't have such a great ride home - and it didn't help that we were stuck in traffic for most of the ride. As we drew nearer to our house, I was trying to think of the best plan to get him in the house. He was having a really hard time walking because of his incision. I had made up my mind to drive up on our front lawn - that way he would only have to get up three steps, but Chad had other plans. He said that he "didn't want tire marks in the yard"....so we went the normal way, and Chad made it up all six steps to the couch. Hooray!!! Once I got him on the couch, he passed out for a little while - which was convenient because I had to go and pick up his pain medicine - not to mention, get things that he may be able to eat. I didn't even THINK about the fact that he wouldn't be able to eat. I had a successful trip, and arrived at home loaded down with sprite, jello, bread, ginger ale, etc... It took a few hours for him to be able to eat or drink anything, but once the nausea went away - it was much better. One jello and a half of piece of bread later, he had a pain pill. The rest of the night was a blur....ice packs on and off every 20 minutes...pain pills every six hours...dogs out, fed, watered, given treats...P.S. I can't imagine having to do this with kiddos. WOw. How do people do it?
So we made it through out first night, second night, and we are having a much better day today. Chad has been able to walk to the bathroom by himself, eat, and even managed to take his bandage off and take a shower. He is amazing, and has kept such a great sense of humor the whole time. I am just SO thankful for such an amazing husband who is willing to endure all of this.
The doctor said that we should not even think about doing any testing (to see if this worked) until January. He said our chances that this will work are 50% - which are actually better odds than IVF, SO here we go again, waiting and waiting. In the meantime, we are going to try and enjoy our favorite season (Fall) together. My fall break is coming and I get to go and visit my family!!!!! HOOOOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!! Then we have a huge craft fair, so I have GOT to get busy making some jewelry and art. Then, we are expecting a big crew for Thanksgiving. In the meantime, we are finishing a garage renovation (to a bonus music room), and getting a bedroom ready in the case that this works and we need to start planning. So...there is my update...I feel good about where we are, and what is to come. The waiting is just the hardest part. :)

The What Ifs....

This month marks 3 years that we have actively been trying to get pregnant. How do I feel about that...Hmm...I think you know. Read a couple of posts...I am working on finding that bright sunny place again....

So with our upcoming surgery on Friday, all I have been able to focus on are the "what ifs"...I am trying to just let it be- have a positive outlook, and trust the God has a plan...BUT at the same time - we don't want to get our hopes up in the case that this is a total bust. In one minute, I feel SO EXCITED that Baby Chalos might actually be a possibility....In the next, I feel like I am in despair over the fact that it may not work. UGH. I miss my old self...The one where I was a rock emotionally. I would like to stop complaining. Sounds SO easy, right? NO...ITS NOT. Not when babies are in your every thought. So...Maybe on a happy note, I will show you some idea of what we would like to do for a baby's room...if this works.

So...We are in love with both of these crib sets...Here are our top two choices...

Litto Kids Silly Owl Bedding - Found at modernnursery.com

Here is another choice...

Macaroni Canary Crib Set from moddecor.com

So...The first option has really cute little owls in a pattern...SUPER modern...The second is just bright and cheery. This is what I spend my time on...when I am feeling positive...Trying to find a balance...We'll see how the goes.

P.S. Everytime I write, I feel like I am having personal verbal diarrhea...then I remember that this is my coping mechanism and it is all mine...and if it makes you sad or angry or you are tired of me complaining, then DON'T READ IT. We can still be friends. I will probably never even know. :)

Hopefully next time I write, it will be with good news.

Will it before you can FEEL it....

So after a pretty down week, I had a FABULOUS night at my girl's bible study tonight. I feel like I have lost a lot of hope in the past weeks - been overwhelmed by my loved ones and their baby blessings - and sat around feeling sorry for myself. In the chapter that we read tonight, Beth Moore talked about how we can't or don't just change how we feel about something. BUT we can change how we think about it. That is my personal mission for the next few months. She said you have to "will it, before you can feel it"....So here goes.... I am willing myself to have faith - to believe that their is a greater plan - to know that God has an amazing family in store for us. Chad has surgery next week. This could be a HUGE answer to all of our prayers. We are trying SO hard not to count on it, but hoping for the best results possible. Here is to hope, strong will, and perseverance - to seeing the bigger picture - to appreciating all of my blessings.